An Open Letter to Nate Robinson

Hey Nate.  Wordaap.

My baby sister and I at the
rehearsal dinner with our
paternal (i.e., sane) cousins.

Back in November, my sister got married in New Orleans.  On the balmy night before her wedding, my wife, kids, and I took a strolled a dozen blocks through the fabulous French Quarter to attend her rehearsal dinner.  We arrived at the restaurant and there were police cars on the sidewalk and officers scattered amid the members of my wildly annoyed family.  Before our arrival, my aunt decided to swipe a cocktail from her daughter (my cousin), and as they pawed at it, the drink shattered.  Small shards got caught in the bartender's eye (which, thank God, were later removed without consequence).  In the name of Downtown Freddie Brown, why am I telling you all of this needless information?  Because that night is irreparably burned into my memory, and I distinctly recall watching the Celtics lose to the Thunder in Boston on the bar's TV while dealing with all of the fallout.  (We sent the two drunks home and partied, as happily as we could, through the rest of the night.)  So that means your new team won't be coming to Boston anytime soon, which is a shame, because you and Perk deserve the recognition of the city that adores you.

In the meantime, please find peace for yourself and take care of Perk.  I would tell him myself, but he's not the type to read a whole lot of blogs or notes from fans.  You, on the other hand, are that type of celebrity, and I hope that you get around to reading these thoughts.   And know that both of you were loved.  Not just liked, loved.

Perkins' last play as a Celtic.
 Moments after injuring his knee, he
blocked David Lee from behind.

Think about it for a moment:  Kendrick was the 7-foot everyman.  Unlike the other Celtics, he possessed no singular, jaw-dropping talent.  Ray had his jump shot, Rondo could handle the ball like no other, but Perk was just there to work.  He wasn't trying to 'do work' in a public show like Kobe, he was just plain working his butt off to make life as miserable as possible for the other team.  And it was never anywhere near perfect.  He could snag a game-changing rebound on one end and bounce the ball off his foot on the other.  But he always helped his team win because of his willingness to work.  Every New England male identified with Perkins, thinking (wrongly) that if we too were muscular and 84 inches tall, we could work hard and help the local team win in just the same way that he did.

The All-NBA 'Old-Man-Game' Team

You know the cat.  He struts quietly into the gym wearing thick, faded, navy blue sweats and a pair of low-top adidas.  His hair and beard are flecked with gray, but at the same time, it is tough to gauge his real age.  As you step close to guard him on the inbounds pass, you notice the smell of Ben-Gay.

Because it seems cruel and easy to guard him, you sag off toward the paint and he churns out a creaky, but precise jumper.  Annoyed, you guard him more closely on the next possession, but your new resolve sucks you into the backscreen he's set for one of his teammates.

On the other end of the court, trying to make motion in a halfcourt set is akin to moving through an endless stream of subway turnstiles, as his forearms never drift more than a few inches from your midsection.  When you do manage to squirt free, you catch the ball and rise above the rim to shoot, but there is no shot -- just a linebacker's swipe and your arms flailing empty-handed.  And now you realize the frustrating task set before you:  this guy has 'old man game'.

Tonight's featured All-Star Weekend event is the Rookie Challenge, pitting the league's newest players against those who have been around a year longer.  Those young'uns may run faster and jump higher, but if I had to lay down some heavy scratch on the game, I would pick this team of old-man gamers without hesitation.

Below is the starting five for my team of players with old-man game.  At each position, I have chosen the player who best exemplifies the qualities of the grey-bearded gym rat.  They received bonus points for playing that way since the earliest years of their career.

Andre Miller:  The honorary captain of the team will not disappoint you.  As I compiled this lineup and worked over the player descriptions, Andre faked a timeout against the Nuggets to earn himself two of the easiest points you will ever see in the NBA.  There are no spare parts with Andre; he uses his brain, his shoulders, his butt, his forearms, and every other conceivably useful part of his body.  He can post up a skinny point guard, set a pick for a teammate, or create separation for some earthbound penetration.  Andre is the anti-Westbrook.  In fact, Russell was guarding Miller when he went to a signature old-school move: making a pass to himself off the backboard.  He has the full compliment of veteran point guard moves: teardrops, spin moves, finger rolls, and of course, plodding penetration.

Self-Doubts from Two Point Guards in One Day

At the beginning of this season, the NBA abounded in great point guard play. National TV personalities made a regular event out of quizzing each other for their top-5 point guards.  Then the season started, and Derrick Rose quickly became everyone's darling with his sterling play.  

Who is the best point guard?  Since Steve Nash's MVP years, the debate has been between Chris Paul and Deron Williams, with rumblings from Celtic fans who want to include Rondo.  While Rose has launched himself into the MVP discussion (not happening, but that's another matter), Paul and Williams took to self-deprecation on the same day.

First, Deron Williams took a shot at his recent play in a post-game interview.

"I'm sick of playing like crap, man. I need to pull my weight and help this team win."

T-Shirt Collection: Atlantic Division

I have a weakness for NBA t-shirts, especially those with logos from the 1980's or earlier.  My wife gets on my case for having too many shirts, and quite frankly, she's right.  But I'm pretty sure that it's the only situation where my obsessive-compulsive tendencies come out.  There are a lot of them, and to keep my obsession's status fixed as 'out-of-sight/out-of-mind', I made space in two dresser drawers for them.  Why does this matter?  Well, it impacts my organizational scheme.  Since I have enough room for four piles of shirts, and since the NBA of my youth had four divisions, my system is to use a separate pile for each division.  Here's most of my pile for the Atlantic Division, with an oddball or two thrown in.

The Sixers, Warriors, and Jazz all made tremendously positive uniform changes before the 2010-11 season, each abandoning newer styles in favor of themes from their classics jerseys of 20+ years earlier.  Philadelphia made changes to bring back the red-and-blue '76' shown on these shirts.  Win.

End of an Epoch?

Jerry Sloan has been the coach of the Jazz for quite a while.  For perspective, Norm Nixon was the backup point guard for the Clippers during Sloan's first win as head coach of the Jazz in 1988.  But his team, and specifically Deron Williams, have played listless basketball over the past month:  they are 4-10 in their last 14 games.  Adding these struggles to the impending free agency of Deron Williams, plus rumors of a malcontented relationship between Sloan and Williams, and the once unthinkable -- a forcible end to Sloan's tenure -- becomes a much more plausible reality.  


Speculation may be premature at this point, but there seemed to be hints coming out of SLC via Twitter that something unusual is underfoot.  The locker room was closed to the media much longer than usual, and general manager Kevin O'Connor was in the room during that time.  Here are some of the tweets leaking the signs:

Hardwood Classics Month (with Update)

Update (2/7):   The Kings are planning on wearing their Hardwood Classics Jerseys, throwbacks to the 1951 Rochester Royals, in games against LAC (2/28), POR (3/2), ORL (3/9), and GSW (3/14).  Buying the package of tickets to all 4 games gets you the world's most disturbing bobblehead.

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(2/4):  February is Hardwood Classics Month in the NBA.  The photos and images of the planned designs are slowly starting to come into the picture.  Here's a breakdown of the details that have come out up to this point.

The Lakers:  It may or may not be related to Hardwood Classics month, but the Lakers used their huge Sunday game against the Celtics to break out jerseys modeled after the ones worn by the 1971-72 championship team -- the ones with the exquisite shadowed numbers.  On the other hand, the shorts and jerseys were seemingly mismatched as two different fabrics, with the top meshier than the bottom.

Hack-A-DeAndre

The Clippers won at home again last night.  It was their ninth straight home win -- the fourth-longest home winning streak in the NBA this season.  If you missed the late Tuesday game and/or the boxscore, Blake Griffin was his typical phenomenal self:  32 points, 11 rebounds, and 6 assists, plus an assortment of dives and tumbles to the Staples Center floor.

"Ersan, try this new beetle pose that I learned in yoga class this week.  It works the glutes really well!"

Coming out of a fourth-quarter timeout, with 3:33 remaining in the game and the Clippers leading 94-87, Scott Skiles elected to employ a Hack-a-Shaq strategy on DeAndre Jordan.  Jon Brockman fouled Jordan, who is hitting his free throws at a 45.9% clip this season.  DeAndre went to the line and made one of the two free throws.

After a Bucks bucket, Brockman gave another off-ball, intentional foul to Jordan and DeAndre again went to the line to make 1-of-2.  Jordan came out of the game shortly after, at the 2:56 mark, with the Clippers still maintaining a seven-point lead.